anewlanguage | video; spam

[Cain has flour on his cheek, and he's in the kitchen, taking a break.] Y'know, worldwide there's room for comfort food after a real shitty day. I'm takin' requests.

Me, I always went for pierogis. Stayed in Poland just long enough to learn how to make 'em. [And to kill a diplomat. But. You know.] Kid seemed to like 'em pretty well, too. Pretty sure tastes change, though...

Anyway, give 'em here, give me all your requests.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

hellofist

I have- a name, now.

From:

anewlanguage

Was tryin' to respect your privacy. [Since she's not the only kid he ever took in but--uh. That's a secret.]

From:

hellofist

Most people know. Already asked them... not to kill you, remember?

From:

anewlanguage

Sure, but do you want me tellin' em your baby stories?

From:

hellofist

[Why did she do this? Why did she open herself up to this? It's stupid, she knows that, but she still doesn't cut the feed.]

Probably you, who shouldn't want it. Start with- two for flinching, maybe?

From:

surfaceshine

Sweetheart.

From:

hellofist

What?

From:

surfaceshine

You good?

From:

hellofist

[Is he serious right now?]

No.

[At least she thinks to make this part private, though.]

From:

surfaceshine

[He's using video. She can see that he already knew the answer to that.]

Want me to shut 'im down?

[He doesn't really know how he's going to do that yet, but if she wants him to, he'll find a way.]

From:

hellofist

Won't change anything. He already- put it all out there. Can't take it back, now.

From:

surfaceshine

You tell me if you change your mind. I'll take the damn thing away.

From:

hellofist

Keep him away from CTS. Next... couple hours.

From:

surfaceshine

He doesn't go in there, but I will.

Text me when you're out. Okay?

Private

From:

hellofist - Date: 2013-06-03 11:49 pm (UTC) - Expand

Private

From:

surfaceshine - Date: 2013-06-03 11:52 pm (UTC) - Expand

Private

From:

hellofist - Date: 2013-06-04 05:10 am (UTC) - Expand

From:

anewlanguage

[It's been a rough month. When he talks to her--or when she is willing to talk to him--it hurts like hell, but he takes it eagerly because in some small way he thinks it will help her. Yes, hit back; that's how you recover.

Because of that he always tries to just keep his expression blank, the way he taught her. He knows full well she can see the little winces under the surface, but hiding it means he's capable of taking more.

But again, it's been a long month. His expression crumples for a full two seconds, and then he swallows hard and starts arranging ingredients.]

Wasn't- wasn't the story I was thinking of.

From:

hellofist

[She's not sure if she should feel guilty or glad she's making her point, glad she's providing a counter-balance to him coming up with this image of a father who made snacks for his child. It's wrong, it feels wrong to let him do that, put himself out there like he's only a good man.

He has that in there somewhere, he has to. She believes he has to, because he wouldn't be here if he didn't have some chance at changing.]

No? Which one, then?

From:

anewlanguage

[Dear God but he wants to just tell her to forget it and hang up now. But that's because answering means sticking his neck further out there, and he really doesn't want to.

But she's the one who gets to call the shots now. He decided that when he voluntarily went to prison.]

What, you really don't remember the chocolate covered strawberries? That time we slipped into the carnival after it closed? We climbed that ferris wheel, looked at the lights. First time you ever had chocolate.

From:

hellofist

[She hates him. She hates him so much right now that she knows if she was there in person, someone would have to pull her off him. She still remembers the last time they "talked" in person, she was able to stop herself from killing him then, as badly as he'd wanted it.

But she loves him, too. She loves him enough to make what she says next something only he will hear.]

No. I remember wanting love, but you- broke my lip, instead. I remember pain. Guns and knives and death. Nothing good.

First time I had chocolate? Not with you. Chocolate ice cream, with Barbara.

From:

anewlanguage

[He wishes constantly he'd done more with her, done things differently, but some things he remembers with so much affection it gets him through those hours when he'd really rather break into Dean's safe and find a gun.

She doesn't remember them.

Which makes him wonder if they happened at all.]

You can't mean that.

From:

hellofist

You didn't name me.

[She's so angry that it's easy to push out full sentences, now.]

You were a trainer. Never acted like father!

From:

anewlanguage

[He has justifications that he uses on every single other person who tries to yell at him on Cass's behalf. He won't use them on her. She'll see that he doesn't really believe them.]

And I should've! I know! There were times I did, don't tell me I never did. I know it wasn't enough, okay? I know I did wrong by you but I did show you things outside the training, I tried to let you smile sometimes-

[He yanks his self-control back up] Y'want me to forget all that, to never speak of it again, I will. I'm not tryin' to erase what I did to you.

From:

hellofist

[She did smile, with him. She remembers that, just like she remembers star gazing and her pride when he'd grin at her when she did something right and her awe when he would move, when he would hurt people. She remembers bicycles made for two.

But there's more, there's things that should have made her cry but didn't because it was conditioned out of her.]

Don't forget it. Remember it. Know that... you could have done it right. You chose to do it wrong.

Tell people you... made me food, if you want. But don't hide behind... few good things you did, to make up for bad. Don't pretend to be... something you aren't.

Private

From:

anewlanguage - Date: 2013-06-04 10:57 pm (UTC) - Expand

Private

From:

hellofist - Date: 2013-06-04 11:00 pm (UTC) - Expand

From:

bodilesswarrior

[She wasn't going to respond. She's staying as far away from David Cain as she can; she's realised bloody vengeance isn't the answer, won't help anything, but that doesn't mean it's easy.

And she wouldn't intercede now, except she sees how upset this conversation is making Cass.]

I'm here. [It's soft, and quiet, all of her own rage pushed aside. She won't tell Cass what to do, how to handle this; she just wants her to know she has support.]

From:

hellofist

I know.

[But it's impossible to ignore how just her voice calms something in Cass, lets her shoulders relax just a little bit. She can focus better now, maybe. Hopefully.]

You always are.